The One Thing I Would Change About Myself: Being Able to Forgive When Necessary

ıIf I had the chance to change just one thing about myself, it would be to tear down that stubborn wall of “Inability to Forgive” that sometimes takes root deep in my heart and wears me out.

ıThis is not a fleeting anger. This means maintaining a perfect record in my mind of past injustices, hurtful words spoken, or disappointments. Just as a computer flawlessly stores data, I meticulously store negativity, as if I were going to relive those moments over and over again.

ıThe Burden of Memory and What Remains

ıLearning from the past is a wonderful virtue. However, my “lesson-learning” method insists on not closing the book, even after the lesson is absorbed. I want to be able to tear out the pages of that notebook, let go of the memories, and keep only the wisdom, when necessary.

ıTo forgive is not to do a favor to the other person, but to lighten my own burden. Every old grudge I carry on my shoulders slows down the steps I will take toward the future. I know that as long as I carry the weight of the past, no matter how far I go, I am actually always staying behind.

ıThe Bridge to Serenity

ıWhat I want to change is not just a behavior, but a blockage in my emotional processing system: The inability to choose serenity over being right.

ıIf I could overcome this emotional constraint, I would filter every piece of information I bring from the past, taking only the lesson, not the pain. Then, I would be a person who is not only logical but also serene and lighter. It is then that my past would not be a chain that defines me, but a step upon which I rise.